LGBTherapy Matters
LGBTQ+ Therapy
with a Gay Therapist
Navigating the Coming Out Journey
Welcome to LGBTherapy Matters. I’m Jeremiah Matters (He/Him), an openly gay therapist serving the LGBTQ+ Community in California and Nevada. Navigating the Coming Out Journey—and realizing that it’s a lifelong process—is not an easy voyage, and it’s something I know first-hand. Growing up in the closet and constantly denying myself well into my 20s made life overwhelming and unmanageable, and it took me several years of looking for affirming therapy until I finally found a therapist who I could be myself around. Learning how to accept yourself in a hetero-normative society is something that brings shame, fear, confusion, pain, suffering, and loss. However, as difficult as life may have been for you thus far, my hope as a therapist is to help you sail out of those dark waters and follow the compass to a brighter place filled with peace, understanding, acceptance, and authenticity.
I also provide Sex Therapy services! I’m currently in training and supervision to become a Certified Sex Therapist. For more details, check out my
Sex Therapy Services page.*
LGBTQ+ Dictionary
Term of the Week:
“Gender Roles”
A set of external expectations that dictate how we "should" show up in the world—how we speak, dress, work, and relate to others. They act as a cultural blueprint for identity, often prioritizing social conformity over individual authenticity. The problem with these is that since they are founded solely on assumptions and stereotypes that we have been socialized to accept, these are often roadblocks to equity and equality.
Check out my LGBTQ+ Dictionary for more terms!
Check out my TikTok
Click on the link above to visit my TikTok and watch my latest videos where I talk about hot topics and clinical issues within the LGBTQ+ Community. Here’s one of my favorite topics below: “Reclaiming Your Gay Childhood.”
*Edit to video: I’m now a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist
Check out my Blog
I write blogs on hot topics within the LGBTQ+ Community, such as gender identity, stereotypes, and more.
Check out my latest blog: “Finding Your Pride: How LGBTQ+ Therapy Can Empower You”
LGBTQ+ News
Check out this article: : “A new HIV diagnosis doesn't have to be nerve-wracking. Advocates share their advice”
Click the title above to read the article, or read other LGBTQ+ news at one of these great LGBTQ+ news websites: Advocate, LGBTQ Nation, Out Magazine, and Pink News.
LGBTQ+ Individual Therapy
When meeting with you for Individual Therapy, I want you to understand that you know your story better than anyone else, but I also know that when we live a life full of lying to ourselves and denying who we are, we also tend to lie about and deny our true emotions—often displaying a façade to the outside world—and this can be harmful not only to ourselves, but to everyone around us. This is why I work with individual clients who are navigating the Coming Out Journey by using Emotionally Focused Therapy, for emotions are what drive our relationships and everything that we do. As an openly gay therapist, I remember what it’s like to hide in the closet, and I also know how liberating it has been to come out. If you want to learn how to accept yourself and start living your life more authentically, check out my “LGBTQ+ Individual Therapy” page by clicking below.
LGBTQ+ Relationship Therapy
Navigating the Coming Out Journey with your partner can be just as difficult as doing it alone. Whereas individuals can go years without ever coming out to their friends and families, partners in a relationship often have a yearning to be known by their loved ones, but they disagree on how to do it due to cultural, religious, and personality differences. When meeting with you and your partner(s) for therapy, I also use Emotionally Focused Therapy, but rather than turning towards oneself, I will have you turn towards one another to help each partner to become more vulnerable with their core emotions so that each partner can be more authentic and understand each other’s attachment needs. As an openly gay therapist in a relationship, I know what it’s like to experience uncomfortable, conflicting emotions, and learning how to vulnerably express them to my partner in a meaningful, respectful way has helped us create a safe space for each other. If you want to learn about how to end unhealthy cycles with your partner so that you can live more authentic lives with each other and those around you, check out my “LGBTQ+ Relationship Therapy” page by clicking below.
Sex Therapy
Sex is supposed to be intimate and fun, but when sexuality concerns interfere with sexual performance and living out your authentic sexual self, exploring can cause frustration, anxiety, guilt, shame, blame, and insecurity, all of which can make exploration seem more like a chore than something to be enjoyed. As difficult as trying to explore and understand your sexuality may have been for you thus far, my hope as a therapist is to help you explore your sexuality and grow your relationships by helping you and your partner understand the emotions underlying the sexual concern so that you can have more grace, patience, compassion, and understanding for your partner. Whether you are pursuing sexual exploration and healing in a partnered-relationship or by yourself, remember that it took a while to get to this point, so it could take a while to find healing, but don’t lose hope. If you want to learn more about how Sex Therapy can help you, check out my “Sex Therapy” page by clicking below.